Monday, April 5, 2010

Awww, so sad

Statistically speaking, a lot of children have felt anxiety by first grade. A true fact is that I started having severe panic attacks in first grade. Something triggered it. A boy threw up in my classroom. Ugh! I remember the day clearly. I felt like I was going to die, right there, in the middle of the classroom and I just wanted to run! The adrenaline was unreal.
My sweet 6 year old. 1st grade. Described to me, the way a panic attack feels.
We had spring break last week. School resumes tomorrow. It shouldn't have surprised me that today, of all days would trigger some chat before bed. Acilia began asking me if she has school tomorrow. My answer was yes. "Well, what if I'm sick" "Why would you be sick?" "I feel sick at school" "How so?" "Well, my head hurts" "Anything else" "I just feel sick all over" "Where" "In my head, my belly, and I feel embarrassed"
I was glad she could describe it with such clarity. I always tell her that if she talks to me about what bothers her, we can fix it together. We will fix this together. If we have to. She's blessed to have me. Of all people to have as a mom, I "get it" after experiencing 25 years of anxiety.

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