Crafty

We are looking forward to trunk or treat tomorrow night! This is the second annual T-or-T for our church and we participated last year too! For those that don't know what trunk or treat is, cars fill the parking lot, they decorate their "trunk" and then the lot gets closed and the kids walk around collecting their candy! It's easy and FUN! 

Some pics from last year: 

Our theme was "games", I found a "Candyland" costume and Al was "Twister" and then we filled our trunk with board games we had and used a twister board as the backdrop. Pretty simple and it turned out really cute!! I also took a deck of cards and strung them across the top of the car!

Family pic. Kids were Little red riding hood and the big bad wolf"

So, to the point of my title "Crafty". This year, the kids are going to be cow(girl/boy) and Al and I will play along by decorating the car in a western theme and dressing Country. I am using Acilia's horses for most of the decor, and I made a trip to Hobby Lobby to browse and get some ideas. (Note on Hobby Lobby, my FAVORITE STORE!!!) I happened to find a 18x24 inch barn wood frame and then I purchased some paper that looked western, I purchased some stencils and then came home and got to work!! I am really happy with how it turned out!! I can't wait to decorate the car and see how it all comes together! Oh, best part, the frame was 50% off!! Did I mention I love that store?!?

The path we are on, leads us to the path we want to go!

The best way to figure out what you don't want in life is by living in it...This post is not in any way meant to make me sound ungrateful for what I have. Believe me, I am happy with the blessings I have in my life and there are many, even on my bad days, I can see through to the wonderful things that are designed for me to take peace and comfort. God is good like that. This house we live in. It's our first house. Everytime we think about selling, I find things that are endearing about it, things that we will most likely never have again in future homes. Then, there are the things I prefer not to have in future homes. Things like boxed off rooms. I've talked about my prayer for an open floor plan in our next house. I've also talked about wanting an eat in kitchen. Something we sacrificed in this house for an island in the middle of the kitchen. Infact, the island has seating, but only room for 2 chairs. When you do the math, 2 chairs for 4 people, not good odds for everyone having a seat to eat. Each night at dinnertime, we separate to eat. It's a horrendous habit. I look forward to the next house having room for a table for us all to sit down together, without the TV, to have that family bonding time that is said to be so important at dinner time.

the island with two chairs.

Seating is critical, not just for our family, but for having company over. I was never big on the idea of entertaining. Now, that we have a house that doesn't fit company very comfortably, I realize that is something I won't sacrifice in the next house. This is the point you might be thinking "Karrie, atleast you have a house, quit your complaining". Believe me when I say, I am aware of the fact that this house is a blessing. We've been able to make the mortgage payments even through tough financial times when Al was on dialysis, and even though paying the bills has been a stress on Al's heart and mind (he's the soul provider) this family has a place we can call home that certainly suits our needs. Living here has taught me what would work for our family and what we can pray for next time. Miles sleeps in a sort of "half room" if you will. I am pretty convinced it was an addition at some point, the walls are not insulated and there is a non-orignal feel to it. It doesn't even have a closet, but there is ample storage on each side (behind the walls, but it's not finished, so we just use it for storage)...Miles' room is a perfect "play room" but it's not ideal for a bedroom. True story. Don't judge me.

Don't let the looks of it fool you, I've worked hard to make it cute, but it's freezing in the winter and hot in the summer. And all of the kid's clothes are jammed into Acilia's closet...

 However, on the other side, I am quite pleased with our master bedroom which if I didn't know better, I would swear it was once two separate rooms! It is huge and it has two closets. Not standard for a home at the beginning of the 19th century.

Check out more pictures of our bedroom here, It really is a great room!

The bathroom downstairs used to be a huge pantry, I am sure of it. But it makes a great sized bathroom.

It's big, this picture doesn't do it justice, it used to have a full sized tub in it, before we ripped it out.

 The house is practical. I am trying to learn to live practical. But my desires get in the way. Perhaps it's something I need to work on. Perhaps what will be good enough is the compromise between practical and desirable. As I sit here on this rainy Sunday afternoon, we just got home from my cousin's house who had their daughter baptized today. It was so nice to celebrate at their house,  instead of going to a restaurant like a lot of parties are held.

Acilia holding the guest of honor

It allowed me to see what it's like to entertain a big group of people, and I liked it. I look forward to doing that at our house someday. It excited me to think of having people in my home, to allow them to make themselves at home and to serve them. A real challenge, but a joyful one would be to host Thanksgiving someday. All trial and error, but I have some wonderful people around me to teach me and to learn from their example. 

If you aren't already thinking it, I will put it out there. Yesterday, I posted about how living in the past makes you depressed and living in the future makes you anxious. And yes, thinking about our future home most certainly is failing to be here and focusing on what we do have vs. what we hope to have in the future. It is true I am feeling a little down today, the rainy weather gets me, I need the sun! But all of that aside, it was so nice to be with family today, celebrating a special little girl becoming a part of God's family. It was great to be surrounded by family and it always puts a smile on my face to think about our future home. Our hope and prayer is that the next house is a permanent home. Where we can really plant our roots and make it a home. Because even though we've lived in this house for 8 years, it's never felt like home. That's the honest truth. I crave a home. A place where I feel we are comfortable and enjoy being there.

One of these doesn't belong...

Depressed.

Anxiety.

Peace.

I can only speak for myself when I use these words, it's different for everyone I would imagine. Depressed. Yes, I feel depressed at times, longer bouts of depression capture me during the winter. I loathe winter. The last few years I've spent some soul time trying to find some things I like about winter and for the most part, it carries me through that dreaded season, but really, I deep down don't like it. Anxiety. Oh yes have I been there!! It's a big part of who I am. Dealing with anxiety my entire life (well, from 1st grade on, but when you are in your 30's, looking back to first grade feeeeels like a life time!) Yes, I've had axiety.

Peace. Well, that's a simple seeming word. It's something we are drawn to want to feel. Inner peace, peaceful life, peaceful surroundings, a zen like state. Yes, I could almost meditate over that word. I envision running water filled streams, walking through a prairie, with the sun warming my body. I hear laughter and bliss and have a sense of well being deep inside of me. Nature is peace for me. I can get to a peaceful place when I am in nature (as long as myself or my kids aren't getting dirty that is! HA!!) I can explore God's creation and I can truly feel a sense of peace.

That's when it hits me. Each feeling, each and every single moment in this life is fleeting. Depression (for me) passes. Anxiety fades. Peace comes and then abruptly goes to chaos. Sometimes all of those can be addressed in one day, one hour, one minute. We are not promised anything in life, this life is a journey, each journey is different.

Last week when I read this, it got me.

"If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present"

 It sparked me to address where I want my happiness to be, I've been praying for peace all year. Not because I feel like I don't have peace in my life, but because I want that to be my center. I want peace to stay with me as my constant. God has been whispering to me to live in the moment. To hold on to that throughout the day. To stop what I am doing to spend time with my kids, to stop what I am doing to have a moment with my husband, to embrace the here and the now. Chores are a daily task, I am pouring myself into bed at night with a spotless house, only to have a new day come and start the chores all over again. My zen is when all of my work is done. I must take a moment to realize that is not where peace is found. Peace is found in my relationships. That is something worth embracing.

For me, that simple quote about peace is a loaded deal. I find myself projecting to the future. I have done this my whole life. It's a bad bad habit. Looking forward to being an adult as a child, I literally wished away all of my school years. Especially high school. I counted down to graduation day literally from my freshman year. I was depressed at the end of each year because the friends I had made were seniors and they were "moving on" as I was "stuck" in school. Once I graduated I looked forward to getting married and having kids. I wished away my "free spirited" years where I could find out who I was and what I had to offer in life, in a marriage and as a mom. Now I have my marriage and my kids and I am back in school, I find myself looking forward to when I graduate with a degree and when we move to a new house and when my kids start at a new school and when they are in high school. It's a never ending pattern with me. I am aware of it, but nothing makes it more clear that I need to slow down on those thoughts than reading the quote about peace. It convicts me. It reminds me to take *this* day. *This* hour. *This* minute. *This* second. Just hold it and feel it and appreciate it.

Organ donation

An experience that made you who you are today.

If you have been a reader of my blog for a while, you may know that I gave a kidney to my husband on December 3rd, 2009. It was only a little over a year ago, and I would like to think that who I am today is more cumulative of many years, but if I had to choose one experience over the course of my life, it's my donation. Going through seeing my husband on dialysis, near the brink of death, and then having what he needed in my body and being able to give it to him, and see him come back to life, I just can't think of anything that could top that.

I will now use this as my platform for kidney donation.
There are countless people on waiting lists for organs.
At the very least, consider being an organ donor after you leave this Earth.
Life can and does live on, through the kindness of organ donors!!
Organ donation can and DOES occur in living donors as well, and that is all around the best option for the recipients!!!
I am here to say, that having a kidney taken out of my body did nothing to the way I feel.
I am the SAME Karrie as I was before donation.
Nothing changed. Literally!
(NOT EVEN MY WEIGHT, I WAS THOROUGHLY BUMMED TO LEARN KIDNEY'S ONLY WEIGH A FEW OUNCES!! WHO KNEW?!)
There are countless resources out there for those interested in being a donor, or atleast learning more about it.
Please consider it. It might be something you are meant to do!

I was never going to get a tattoo. But I have these scars, and I could either hide them, or embrace them. So I designed this tattoo to work around my scars and allow them to share my message :)

I had that tattoo done in April 2010 (it was roughly 5 months after surgery) you can still see the two laporascopic scars up near the top of the tatoo, and the exit site scar under the words "Be a Donor"

This is my tattoo now, nearly 3 years after the surgery, as you can see, the scars are almost completely invisible! Infact, when I went for my two year post op check up, the NP had a bit of trouble locating the exact spot of the scars!! AMAZING!!

School snacks

I don't know what it is, but when a classroom party comes up where we are asked to bring a treat, I get great joy out of planning the "perfect" snack! One that is healthy, easy to make, creative AND fun!

Each time, I get that little anxiety feeling while I am searching, thinking one of these times I won't be able to find something that will satisfy my need to be unique!

With all of the creative peeps out there in the Internet world, I think it's safe to rest assured that will never happen! Ideas are abundant!!

Halloween is on it's way, today I got an email from the class mom about the party that is in the works. I did a quick search and when I found the prized snack, I eagerly volunteered to be "Snack lady"

I am soooo excited to share these with Acilia's class!


For the healthy aspect:

seriously!? Does it get any cuter than this?? Single serve mandarin orange cups with Jack O' Lantern faces drawn on!! SO STINKIN' CUTE!! And too easy!

And next up, for the touch of candy fun! Another easy! Pretzels with melted Hershey's hugs with candy corn topping! LOVE!!

Can't wait until Halloween!

Answer to prayers!

Do you have any idea how many times I have wished that the stomach flu did not exist? It is it he source of my anxiety. I am usually so anxious through flu season that I can't even eat. It's serious.
Today a friend of mine posted on Facebook that her child has it, another friend posted this:
Stop the Stomach flu in it's tracks
You better believe I am running to the store to get some grape juice to keep in the house!!

Ponder this

I was driving in to class today, and was struck with a beautiful reflection. God speaks to mein the perfect moments always, and for that very reason, I feel it on my heart to share with others. So, here is my reflection: 

We live in a "what's in it for me" society..... it's easy to get caught up in 
that mentality.... until you stop and ponder.... Jesus died for me, how can I live for him?