Parenthood changes you. There are the obvious things that occur inside of a parent. Then, there are the changes that creep up on you.
I speak today about riding motorcycles. My husband has been an avid motorcycle rider since the ripe old age of 16. I started dating my husband when I was 19. His motorcycle was a thrill for me. Big part of our lives. I kept him company while he cleaned it. I begged him to take me on rides. I was absolutely in awe of this vehicle that was so fast and so joyous! My parents hated it! H A T E D i t. Can't blame them. Motorcycles are so very dangerous. Over the years we've been to more funerals than I would like to admit due to motorcycles. When I first started riding, jeans were considered the only must. We didn't wear jackets or helmets or gloves, and it was fine. We had no worries, we felt invincible. I was carefree on the back of that bike and I yearned for each and every ride! Years passed and my daughter was born. I recall a not so shiny moment during my pregnancy that I literally BEGGED Al to let me ride on the back. I was not very far along, there was no belly showing and I didn't understand why he wouldn't let me. I was so mad at him because he went anyway and I was left home. Acilia was born and she was very little when I got back on the bike. Life was a little bit different. I started saying prayers when I got on the back because I realized that both of her parents were on the same bike and the odds were unsettling that something *could* happen to us. The joy of motorcycles started to slip away a little bit for me. Afterall, I was a mom now. Life was not carefree as it was a short time before. Here I am 8 years later. Al still has a motorcycle, he had three up until recently! It's a true passion for him and as his wife I feel it's my duty to share in that passion sometimes. Today was one of those days. It's been amazingly beautiful here in the Chicago land area this past week and I felt it to be important to enjoy a few hours out on the bike with my husband. I said my prayers and then situated myself on the back of the bike, then allowed myself to enjoy the beautiful fall foliage. I was in my full gear, jacket, helmet, jeans, boots. That didn't make me feel safe though. The reality is, if we went down at a speed over say 45...there are serious injuries. It kills me that I can't enjoy something my husband enjoys, it kills me more that I feel guilt being on the back of that bike as I have children at home that need their momma. They need their daddy too. Life is so precious. Until this phase in our lives passes, I just pray that God is not ready for us up in Heaven just yet.
I give you major props for riding. I once had a doctor say that if weren't for motorcycles and cigarettes they'd all be out of business. I don't think you'd be unsupportive by choosing not to ride. Just a thought. He could still enjoy it. There is always room for compromise in marriage. However, if you feel strongly that you should support him in this way, then by all means go for it. : )
ReplyDeletegreat post!!!!! love your perspective.. and kudos for getting on it.. I used to be so adventerous.. now, being on the swings with my girls can make me nervous....
ReplyDeleteso I actually love this post. I know a lot of people that feel the same way, and gave up riding (because like you said, it IS dangerous) and I think sometimes we get to have our fun when we are younger but after kids? Things need to be sacrificed. And this is coming from someone who LOVES wild and crazy!
ReplyDeleteSo good to hear from you...and I agree about being a parent. I don't like to fly with Russ, I know crazy! Someday when our responsibility is different...I hope all is well with you. I see it has been a while on your 365. I read your post below, your pictures are great and they tell your story you should not worry about editing, etc. They are your story and that makes them perfect! Look forward to visiting again soon. Have a great night.
ReplyDeleteTiffany